1.
People will show up to places in crop tops and no tights in 30-degree weather.
2.
Alexa Chung will DJ a party held in a store.
3.
Spiced nuts will be easily confused with cat food.
4.
People will party after every single little thing.
5.
Someone will show up somewhere wearing jeans and a turtleneck and feel like a homeless person.
6.
Anna Wintour will be photographed running out of a show like a bomb is about to go off.
7.
Kanye West will show up to the most random things.
8.
People will brag about the wildly exclusive shows they got invited to.
9.
No one will be able to recognize "celebrities" sitting in a front row.
10.
André Leon Talley will show up somewhere and out-fabulous everyone.
11.
People will wear fur and everyone will think it's cool instead of feeling morally offended.
12.
People will also wear that fur in the weirdest places.
13.
Publicists will mail editors "fashion week survival kits."
14.
Anna Dello Russo will wear funny hats.
15.
Shoes will look like torture chambers.
16.
The weather will do something that is definitely not "outfit friendly."
17.
But no matter what happens with the weather — rain, sleet, tsunami, etc. — Anna Wintour will show up everywhere on time, bone-dry.
18.
Random audience members will wear sunglasses inside for no reason.
19.
People will get really, really, REALLY stressed out, like they're about to give birth or something.
20.
It will be impossible to find a full-size dessert.
21.
Your Instagram feed will be flooded with fashion-blogger selfies.
